D GrayMan Reflected
by Tomogirl
Summary: A "what if" continuation from Night 213. Allen was told that once the 14th took over, he would no longer be "himself", but Nea says otherwise. Once Allen 'knows', what will he do? The real truth is...?
1. Day 214: Prelude of Allen

This story is inspired by one of my theories, and I wanted to see if I can turn that slightly into a reality (while waiting for the next real chapter of DGM). Note: I recommend some of you guys, if you haven't already, to read the Reverse Novels. Particularly, the one which details on Red and Mana's pasts. I may be using some references from there into this story.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own any of the characters and settings of DGM. Everything belongs to Katsura Hoshino!

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**D Gray-Man Reflected **

**Day 214: Prelude of Allen ~ the startling discovery**

"Then the boy fell asleep  
and one or two ambers in the fading ashes of the fire  
flared up in the shape of a beloved face

Dreaming many thousands of dreams  
spreading across the land  
Your silver gray eyes shine their light  
like starts falling down from the night sky

Even though countless of years  
turn so many prayers back to earth

I will keep praying  
somehow, love for this child please  
kissing the joined hands"

Her voice floated through his head; this ever so gentle and tender loving voice. A voice that he shouldn't be familiar with, but why does it feel…nostalgic? Brief flashes of scenes appeared before him. The source of the singing voice was this beautiful lady, with her red hair tied into a pony tail. She was singing to a baby, who was then gently put down onto a blanket besides another baby, who looked identical to this baby.

_Twins? _

The scenery changed again. This time, a smiling young boy with that beautiful red hair color, has his left hand reaching out towards him. Him?

_Me?_

Allen Walker widened his eyes as he realized he was standing in the middle of a wheat field. He was dressed in a white buttoned shirt topped with a thin red bow tie and a very formal looking brown colored pants. The wheat's golden color swooned quietly when a small gust of wind picked up. The boy, who was reaching his hand out towards him earlier, was nowhere in sight.

_Where am I? It's another one of those feel good dreams?_

Several yards away, a big two story mansion stood proudly amidst the wheat field. It looked really lonely even with trees lying against its walls. Allen blinked. He almost felt like pinching himself on the cheeks. Then, the sudden realization dawned on him as if he was struck by lightning.

_Of course! I'm seeing Nea's memories! Wait, once this whole thing is done, wouldn't that mean he would take over my body? Who was with me before I ended up in this state? …Right, Kanda and Johnny! If I became the 14th in front of them… Kanda would probably try to kill my body for real! I got to get out of here. I tried my best NOT to fall asleep after all this time. Where's the exit? _

Allen stared with a dumbfounded look at the mansion for several seconds before deciding to do one of the most painful things he could do to himself. SLAP! WHACK! PUNCH PUNCH!

His face, even if it wasn't his real face, was being beaten up by both of his hands. After a minute of committing violence on his face, all Allen could mutter out loud was a big long, "Owwww."

_This dream feels too real. If slapping and hitting myself won't work, then maybe falling off the roof of that mansion will do the trick!_

Allen tromped with a sour look on his face, through the wheat towards the building. He couldn't wait to get back to the waking world just to prove to everyone that he's done his best so far to repress the 14th's memory. Allen made it to the first step out of three, that lead to the mansion's front door, but that was as far as he went. His eyes narrowed a little at the front door's detail. There was something about the door's design that he couldn't shake off from his mind.

_No, what am I doing just standing here? I'm sure this is just the 14th's memory trying to weave itself into me. Looking at a stupid door design is suddenly going to make me think I saw this door before? Hahahahahah…. Yeah, right… It's not going to get me…_

Yet, Allen's feet did not move from that spot. Allen's eyes were still transfixed on the front door.

_Come on, feet! Move damn it! _

"Now, that's not a proper way to ask your feet to move. I'm afraid your feet will permanently be stuck there until you ask them in a more polite tone of voice," a familiar voice spoke clearly from somewhere within the area. Allen's head shot up at once. His expression turned into one that displays a lot of annoyance.

"Where are you! Stop hiding from me, …Nea!"

"My..., I didn't think you'd start calling me by my name so soon. However, I'm happy for this. You're going to start getting more acquainted with that name. Especially since it once belonged to…..you."

"I have no idea what you're talking about! It's your name, not mine," Allen expressed angrily as he craned his head and neck in all possible directions trying to find Nea.

"Poor Allen. The puppet of a mad man's existence. You're finally at the stage where you'll be free of being a puppet."

"And I'd appreciate it if you stop talking in riddles! The last time you said I was a 'puppet', I didn't have much time to think about it."

"Only because the real you was being pulled by strings on that day."

"That wasn't the real me! I nearly killed people back then! No wait…, that was YOU!"

"Me? All I did was meet you in your head. Everything after that was your doing. Of course, you can't remember that. You were still a puppet to that mad man."

"Arrrghh… You're still not making any sense! I don't care about this puppet thing! Just give me answers! Why me? Why choose me? And when did you choose me? Because of me….! Because of me… Mana's…," Allen's voice changed immediately from a roaring rage to a soft murmur. He bowed his head quietly as he thought briefly of the day he wished for Mana to come back to life.

"Have it ever occurred to you as to why it was strange to suddenly think of mother's lullaby when you were little? Why would a Noah inhabit a host so young and not someone more powerful? Why did you have a natural connection with Mana, but a very bad reaction when he started to exhibit terrible signs? Has it ever occurred to you, Allen, that you may not be a host after all?"

"….Then what about you? What exactly are you? You're the Noah.….Wait, 'mother'?"

"I will explain the nature of my existence in due time. For now, if you want to know the full truth, all you have to do is step into Walker Manor and let your mind go free." Nea's voice sounded reassuring, but it didn't easily convince Allen at all.

"Why should I put my trust into whatever you have to say? I bet that when I step inside, you'll ambush me and take over my brain. Then, you'll eat my insides until there's nothing left. You'll use my body to seek revenge against the Earl and become the next Earl. You said that so yourself!"

"Quite an imagination as expected of someone who believed every single word Cross Marian said to you. You must forgive him one day. He doesn't know the full truth of the situation. All he knows is what he gathered from that 'person' who I….no, 'you' entrusted your Will to," Nea paused for a moment letting Allen's eyes glowered in continued disbelief. "I can see your impatience, at the same time, doubtfulness of your own situation. What exactly is the truth? What is a lie? Is the reality that you're most familiar with all that you've ever known? It's true, I want to eliminate that troublesome Earl and surpass him, but it's not the reason that you're thinking of. If only it was that easy to get you to remember…. But nevertheless, things have to be done this way. … Aren't you glad you're not a normal Noah?"

This made Allen look up again into the clear blue sky and glare hard at it. "Shu-Shut up! You're making my head hurt more than it should be! I never wrote any Will. You did!"

"Allen, have you ever wondered why you can't remember anything before your time at the circus? The people there assumed you were abandoned because of that Innocence possessed left hand. They thought you were dumped there by parents, you don't seem to recall either."

"Hmph! I was fairly young. How am I supposed to remember what my parents looked like? They left me. That's all! I don't care about whether I had them or not!" Allen was beginning to think this whole discussion was going nowhere. This Nea person kept talking about his own past. What about Nea's?

"How unfortunate to think like that. What a pity from someone who came from a loving home. I can understand why the circus has turned you into quite a brat."

"Enough! Enough about me! Why so much interest? Awhile ago, I was thinking that talking to you might be a good thing. That it would help us understand better of what happened between you and the Earl, 35 years ago. This isn't what I had in mind…."

"Oh, but everything is connected, Allen. Especially, to you. It's because of you that I exist."

"….."

"Keep doubting me if you must. I know this isn't easy."

Allen didn't respond after Nea's last sentence. All he did was clench his right fist with an inner rush of fury. If Nea ever physically showed himself before him, he knew he would immediately punch him somewhere in the face. While Allen's attention was focused on the ground, thinking of more ways of how to beat up Nea, he didn't realize the front door of the mansion was open.

As if that was a big cue, a rush of harsh wind blew from nowhere and slammed itself onto Allen's back.

"Whaaa!" Allen cried out as he felt the surge of the wind hitting him hard. His hands were at his sides fluttering around. He then tried to use his left hand to enlarge itself so it can grab onto one of the nearby tree branches. Nothing happened. His left hand didn't change at all. _I guess I can't use my Innocence in the dream world?_ A slight tear appeared out of the corner of one of Allen's eyes as he felt his body being lifted by the wind. He then came crashing through the mansion's door with a harsh THUD.

"Allen….," Nea's voice came softly out of nowhere, "do you truly believe this is all but a dream?"

The mansion's door slammed shut and Allen was left in a huge room filled with nothing but darkness. Darkness, and Nea's voice still talking as if he was in the room with him.

"Welcome home. It's been years….."

o o o o

_**/ To be continued….**_

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Final notes: Not intended to be a horror story so don't worry. :D


	2. Day 215: The 14th's opening

A/N: Since I am a semi-grammar nazi, I have gone back to Day 214 to correct something that shouldn't have existed near the bottom of the story. I haven't been on this site for awhile so I keep forgetting that putting the exclamation and question marks together would not work as only one of them would be the outcome after publishing the story. My apologies if anyone has spotted that awkward punctuation.

At nicky: Thank you for your encouragement! You're making me a bit nervous now though. Hehe… ^_^ (Sadly, compared to when I was younger on this site, I think I'm writing shorter pages now.)

To the rest of you guys following along: Appreciate your followship. Just to warn you in advance that if the official story, starting with Night 214, contains something of my theory, I will put an end to this story. Also, I may have to help out on translating Night 214 when it's posted on 2ch so I will feel a bit conflicted after finishing up with that. (To MH users, yes, I am that "person".)

**Disclaimer: **I do not own any of the characters and settings of DGM. Everything belongs to Katsura Hoshino, except for anything that doesn't exist in her story. That includes character personalities if I have to improvise with some of them.

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Everything was pitch black before his eyes. He was on his knees feeling a cold stone floor with his bare hands. Despite being placed into a sinister looking situation, the boy just couldn't feel any sense of danger, which was strange. Just a few moments ago, he set his senses on high alert when hearing Nea's voice, but after being whooshed into this giant house, there was a weird sense of peace from within his own body. _Why? What's this…?_ As soon as he thought of those questions, a disembodied voice spoke gently besides him, but he didn't feel the need to turn his head towards the direction of where this voice was coming from.

"Welcome home. It's been years….."

**D Gray-Man Reflected**

**Day 215: The 14th's opening  
**

Allen Walker, at the age of 16, never imagined that he would one day officially be trapped within his own mind. (Literal speaking, of course.) Nor would he ever imagine that he would become a Noah. However, none of that seems to matter now compared to his present stunned face that can't easily be seen in such a dark environment.

"Home?" the word felt foreign to Allen as it went off the tip of his lips. This place was his home? How can some place so dark be something he was a part of?

"It appears that time is stuck in a frozen state. I would appreciate it if you can get it to move once more."

"Huh?" The white hair boy was completely beyond lost as to what Nea was talking about. "Time? …Wait-a-minute! I still don't understand any of this! My former home was a traveling circus. After that, the Black Order. I never once stepped foot into this part of the world. Stop treating me like I know something! I…"

"The current 'you' never came here. However, don't you feel a small sense of familiarity with this place? With Walker Manor? The beautiful sky? The unlimited amount of wheat that embraced you when you walk through it? Nature was your best friend. You never wanted to part with it, ever. You always considered life as something precious from God. Mana was the same. That was until…."

"The Earl came to meet me," these words smoothly finished Nea's sentence. Allen, ignoring the fact that the room was completely dark, quickly stood up in shock. His lips were moving on their own. Allen pressed the back of his right hand against his mouth as he let his eyes narrow a little bit. _What the heck? This is another of his trickeries, isn't it? He's trying to make me think I am HIM, for real! When he said all those words, I saw images buzzing through my head again. _

"Allen, since you are having such a difficult time remembering, I will give you a hint as to how to make the time flow once more." A small ball of white light flickered into existence in front of Allen. It was about the size of Allen's palm.

"…?" Allen quizzically looked at the ball of light before grumpily looking all around him just to reply with a twinge of sarcasm, "What do you want me to do with that? Eat it?"

"All you have to do is catch it and you'll be able to eat a big meal fit for a king! Mana will scold you if you don't, and he'll probably lock you out of the house until you start crying."

For something that sounded so simple, Allen couldn't shake off the feeling he heard those words before, even though, he's PRETTY sure he never heard them ever before in his life. "I'll play along with your silly game, but you definitely owe me a big explanation after this!" Allen held out both of his hands in the air, trapping the ball of light in between both of them. In a blur of a second, Allen clapped his two hands together with full belief that the ball of light has been successfully captured. "Too easy. What kind of hint is this?"

"Is it now?" Nea's voice sounded like it was teasing him. "Open your hands and look. Do you think you can simply do everything with just using your hands?"

Suddenly, Allen felt a feeling that he hasn't felt since he made several trial and errors under Cross's training exercises. He slowly opened the palm of his hands knowing full well that there was nothing in his hands. "So, if this ball of light cannot be caught physically…."

"Too bad. It's just a ball of light! Guess you'll have to earn the spell of life the harder way."

Allen blinked._ …?_ _Was this voice, Nea's? It was starting to sound like... _FLOOSH! The floor, beneath Allen, vanished. "!" He felt his body falling downward but only for a few seconds. Within this short period of time, he was floating in mid-air. As soon as he was able to register exactly what was going on, he felt the floor come crawling back and encompass the bottom portion of his body (at the waist line). _Stuck!_ Allen attempted to use his left hand to claw himself out of the floor, but it was still to no avail. He stopped his actions as soon as he heard a sound of footsteps thumping its way towards him. Even though everything was dark around Allen, the sound of the voice that followed these footsteps totally confirmed who it was.

"Nea, don't cry. Crying only makes you lose your energy. You have to be strong in order to get yourself out of the hole, ok? If you don't struggle, you'll be lost forever," as soon as the voice said its last words, the footstep sounds came to an immediate halt.

This re-assuring voice compelled Allen to look up. It was indeed the same voice he heard just a few seconds ago. Also, the same voice belonging to the pony-tailed youth, who held out his hand in desperation back when he was in the world of the waking. Allen didn't realize it, but his right hand was starting to move on its own reaching out towards the area where those footsteps were. The right hand fingers curved around empty air, but they definitely look like they were grabbing onto something. Following suit with the hand, Allen's mouth began to move before his mind could connect with his body, "I'm sorry. I….I'm trying my best. Really! Mother would want that from me too, right? …I remember now! It's 'Okosukari'!"

PANG! The room exploded with light, and Allen was no longer stuck inside an invisible hole. He found himself on his stomach, laying on a purple oriental rug surrounded by several pieces of old Victorian style furniture. The main portion of the floor is made of ivory marble. Several feet away, facing Allen, are two huge windows that are semi-hiding behind a medium size sofa. Sun light was streaming through them. A big white ornate fireplace was crackling to Allen's right side. A new wave of nostalgia washed over Allen as he gazed at his newly lit up surroundings. _This is the guest greeting room. Once a month, Mother use to place a fresh batch of sunflowers on top of the fireplace. I use to come here all the time to practice….. Stop! These are not my memories! These aren't mine!_

Allen slowly stood up as he placed a hand to his head. His heart was throbbing. He was trying hard to resist what he thinks aren't his. However, at the back of his mind, something was nagging at it. That he should officially stop running and face everything before him. Why is he so afraid if these memories aren't his? Allen stood still for awhile looking down at the rug. The rug, itself, looks a bit worn, which was a sure sign that it's been in this place for a very long time. _So, this is the house that Nea grew up in. The fact that I'm not hearing his voice anymore, makes me worried. _

"Hahaha...," giggles of laughter interrupted Allen's thoughts. They were coming from a room nearby. Allen quickly came out of the guest room following the sounds of the laughter. He paused as he was now in the main atrium of the mansion. It was a little exquisite, but still a simple looking foyer even if it has a grand staircase and a huge golden candelabra hanging from the ceiling. Allen didn't dawdle too long as he knew, somehow by heart, as to where to go next. The laughter continued allowing Allen to walk pass the grand staircase and turn to his right to a doorway that's hidden behind the staircase. Upon reaching the door, Allen's eyes widened.

A swath of butterflies and moths were flying around the room. They were blanketed in a light yellowish glow. Two young red hair boys were on their knees looking up at the flying insects. Both of them were smiling and looking like they were having a good time. Allen was looking at the insects in awe. _This is the location spell. I remember telling Mana that I chose moths because they're sometimes misunderstood, and for butterflies, because they represent change. This is also one of my first spells ever done successfully._ Once these thoughts came through his mind, Allen froze. Has Nea finally grabbed a firm hold on his brain? Or, has he gone into the abyss of madness just like Mana? Allen instantly turned away from the room only to come face to face with someone, he would never expect to bump into. _Mother….._

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"Allen, please hang on," Johnny spoke with his continued optimism. He was holding tightly onto Allen's gray colored hand. He almost thought it was his imagination that he saw Allen's mouth move. Timcanpy, floating besides Johnny, continued to stare at Allen's sleeping form in his quiet usual way. Then without warning, he jolted up a little as if he sensed something. He quickly gave his wings a flap before jolting out of the room and head for the safe house's front door.

"Timcanpy? You're leaving too? Wait! Come back! …," Johnny worriedly glanced over his shoulder. Everyone was leaving him and there was nothing he could do to stop them. He turned back to look at Allen, but dropped his worried expression. There was no use in getting worked up of being alone. "I'm not alone, stupid! I'm with Allen! Allen needs all the support even with one person here!" Johnny spoke out loud with one of his hands pumped up into a fist. His face changed back to that over-confident look with his cheeks flushing a tint of red.

"Who are you talking to?" Kanda stormed loudly into the room, which made Johnny jump a little in his seat. He then proceeded to check every crook and cranny of the room making Johnny grit his teeth in embarrassment with a sweatdrop rolling down his cheek.

"Kanda, you're back! I, uh…. I was talking to myself so don't worry! There's no one here!" as soon as Johnny said that, Kanda halted in his tracks and turned around in order to give the ex-scientist a stare of indifference. Johnny clumsily tried his best to ignore this weird unKanda-like stare by changing the subject of discussion. "By the way, Timcanpy flew off to somewhere. Did you see where he went?"

"No. Oh, so that was the yellow blur that passed by when I went through the door? I don't know where he went. That golem better come back before Bean Sprout wakes up. How's Bean Sprout, anyways?"

"Nothing has changed. He's still like this," Johnny ended his sentence with a sigh. He wasn't sure what else could be said about Allen's condition. There was a brief moment of silence between the two of them before Johnny just had to ask, "What happened? Did you go somewhere?"

"…..…..We apparently had a rat following us all this time. Don't worry though. That guy fully believes that Bean Sprout may be able to overcome his fate as the Fourteenth."

Johnny looked up with a puzzled look. "Someone was following us? Who?" He then heard a light knocking at the room's doorway. He turned towards the sound just to see Link resting against the doorway's frame with his arms crossed against his chest. "In-Inspector Link? You're alive!"

"So, this is the current fate of Walker? I see that his transformation has fully set in." Link left the doorway and walked over towards Allen's bed. He stopped right besides the bed's head section staring hard at Allen's face. His eyes lingered on the stigmata marks on the boy's forehead. "How long has he been sleeping like this?"

"Since this afternoon. …I wonder if some of this is my fault? I wanted to find him so badly, but in the end, I didn't realize he was trying very hard to suppress the 14th." Johnny's grip on Allen's hand got a little tighter as he bowed his head with sadness.

"If there's anyone to blame, it's me," Kanda's blunt voice came into the discussion, "I'm the one who injured him, causing his change to accelerate. I didn't expect that at all."

"Even if you guys did nothing, Walker's fate would be inevitable. ….That's right, Walker has that scar on his chest," Link said as he walked around Johnny's chair and stopped right besides the chair's left hand side. "Perhaps, I can heal it." Within a split of a second, Kanda pointed a wrapped up Mugen at Link's throat.

"Even though you said all those things before, there could still be a possible secret you're withholding."

"Everything I told you is completely how I feel, and mine alone. You have my word that I will not be a threat to Allen Walker's life," Link spoke without looking at Kanda. His focus was completely on Allen. Johnny watched both of them with uncertainty before deciding to man up and pitch in his thoughts.

"Kanda, I think we can completely trust in the Inspector. I have that feeling we'll be needing his service a lot of times from this point onward. You can heal people, Inspector? That's great!"

"…," Kanda gave Link one long look before lowering the wrapped up Mugen. "Fine. You can do you whatever you want. I will promise you though that if you do break your word, I will hunt you down until your legs can no longer walk this earth." Kanda turned towards the doorway and proceeded to leave the room.

"That's fine with me. I know I can trust you in ending me if anything should happen. Especially when it comes to the Head Inspector," Link expressed a small smile while still not turning to look at Kanda. Kanda didn't reply back, but he gave a short pause in his steps before continuing on his way back to the living room. Johnny didn't look up to watch Kanda leave either. He also went back to focusing his attention on Allen's well-being silently praying in his head.

* * *

Was she smiling at him? Allen wasn't so sure. She was standing there watching with those gentle eyes of hers. Her figure was very delicate looking almost like a porcelain doll that should be handled with care. What Allen recognized the most about her was that, she was wearing her favorite cream color one piece summer dress. She usually wears it on sunny days only.

"Mother! Did you see what I did?" the voice of a child, around the age of 8 or 9, cried out behind Allen. Allen turned to see one of the red hair children pointing towards the small room, still swirling with butterflies and moths. The young boy's eyes were lit with enthusiasm. In response to that, the woman nodded her head in understanding. Then unexpectedly, the young boy ran right through Allen in order to grab a hold of the woman's left hand. He tugged on her hand and led her excitedly towards the room.

Allen, feeling awkward of being in the way and not wanting to have two people go through him, immediately stepped aside. He couldn't help but smile at the scene that is starting to become more familiar every second or so. Without realizing it, himself, he was no longer resisting the memories that were coming into him…..

o o o o

**/ To be continued…..**

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****Minor trivia: "Okosukari" is a combination of two Japanese words. "Okoso" for "revive" and "sukari" for "net". Initially, I was going to have Nea remember it through the word "okaa-san" (mother), but I realized it wouldn't work out so well. Furthermore, the Walker family speaks English so using that wouldn't make any sense.


End file.
